Top Ten George W. Bush Complaints About England

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10. "Clocks are five hours fast"

9. "Everybody's speaking some crazy foreign language"

8. "Harry Potter won't return phone calls"

7. "So touchy about minor things...like going to war under false pretenses"

6. "They don't know where Saddam is either"

5. "Queen Elizabeth not half as funny as 'King of Queens'"

4. "Disappointed to learn 'Big Ben' is just a giant clock"

3. "Pack a gum costs 2 pounds -- who carries two pounds of money?!"

2. "I've been here for 36 hours and Prince Charles hasn't made a single move on me"

1. "Driving on the left reminds me of my drinking days"