Ten Commandments of Tech Support [Archive] - Cyber Tech Help Support Forums

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tramtwo

October 18th, 2000, 08:56 AM

http://dameon.meaux.net/commandments.htm

I still have not stopped laughing. http://www.cybertechhelp.com/ubb/biggrin.gif http://www.cybertechhelp.com/ubb/biggrin.gif http://www.cybertechhelp.com/ubb/biggrin.gif

I mean it is sage advice. http://www.cybertechhelp.com/ubb/wink.gif

Kimmygem

October 18th, 2000, 09:26 AM

lmao....the tech guys will love this one!

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tramtwo

October 18th, 2000, 09:38 AM

equal time
http://dameon.meaux.net/commandmentz.htm

Sharpy

October 19th, 2000, 06:30 PM

Both of these are excellent advice for anyone either phoning tech support or thinking of doing as a job.

I've been on both sides and i must admit the Tech Support guys have a hell of a job.

My two most hated replies.

Q. What did you do before the problem started? ie. installing/deleteing programs or the computer locked while playing a game.

A. I didn't do anything!

and

Q. Where are the driver disks i gave you with the computer?

A. What disks?

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...Sharpy...
Official member of the "Chewed out by Kimmy club." (http://www.cybertechhelp.com/ubb/Forum1/HTML/000035.html)

wardensu

October 19th, 2000, 06:55 PM

Thank you for that link Tramm.

I am still a newbie and will always be one. I do not claim to know ANYTHING about a computer, except what I know.

I use Prissey for my buisness, and can follow instructions, as long as they are given in English. I have the best tech in the world in my family, Rosiewolf, and am lucky in that aspect.

Rosie gets exasperated with me when she says click and I clunk! Oh well. she loves me anyways.

Can anyone else make a sirloin lasagna? Can you cut down a 15" diameter tree and have it fall where you want it too? Can you gut and skin a catfish or rabbit? Can you wring a chickens neck and still get eggs from it?

oh the ways of the computer life... http://www.cybertechhelp.com/ubb/wink.gif

We all have our talents. http://www.cybertechhelp.com/ubb/biggrin.gif

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...just dropped in to see what condition my condition was in...

ironside

October 19th, 2000, 07:17 PM

ha ha now you done it im laughing
wring its neck and still get eggs from it nope cant say i could, heck i couldnt wring its neck either.
remind me not to get you mad at me either.
LMAO

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Sharpy

October 19th, 2000, 08:07 PM

Hey I'm not slagging people for needing help it's just some people don't listen and can't be bothered to learn. If people have a genuine interest then i have loads of patience but when your asked the same old question for the 100th time then it gets a bit annoying.

Example:

I had this conversation recently with a lady who swore she had been using computers since forever.

Tech Support: "All right. Now click 'OK'."
Customer: "Click 'OK'?"
Tech Support: "Yes, click 'OK'."
Customer: "Click 'OK'?"
Tech Support: "That's right. Click 'OK'."
Customer: "So I click 'OK', right?"
Tech Support: "Right. Click 'OK'."
Pause.

Customer: "I clicked 'Cancel'."
Tech Support: "YOU CLICKED 'CANCEL'???"
Customer: "That's what I was supposed to do, right?"
Tech Support: "No, you were supposed to click 'OK'."
Customer: "I thought you said to click 'Cancel'."
Tech Support: "NO. I said to click 'OK'."
Customer: "Oh."
Tech Support: "Now we have to start over."
Customer: "Why?"
Tech Support: "Because you clicked 'Cancel'."
Customer: "Wasn't I supposed to click 'Cancel'?"
Tech Support: "No. Forget that. Let's start from the top."
Customer: "Ok."
I spent the next fifteen minutes re-constructing the carefully crafted setup for this lady's unique computer.

Tech Support: "All right. Now, are you ready to click 'OK'?"
Customer: "Yes."
Tech Support: "Great. Now click 'OK'."
Pause.

Customer: "I clicked 'Cancel'."
And people wonder why my mouse pad has a target on it labeled "BANG HEAD HERE."

Ok so it might be funny but it's also true of hundreds of customers i've had to deal with and no matter what i've always been curtious even if it did almost kill me.

Needless to say i don't do tech support anymore. http://www.cybertechhelp.com/ubb/smile.gif

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...Sharpy...
Official member of the "Chewed out by Kimmy club." (http://www.cybertechhelp.com/ubb/Forum1/HTML/000035.html)

Kimmygem

October 20th, 2000, 12:13 AM

Sounds like when you're helping me! And you promised you wouldn't tell anyone about it...not asking you anything again! http://www.cybertechhelp.com/ubb/biggrin.gif

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tramtwo

October 20th, 2000, 01:35 AM

tramtwo

October 20th, 2000, 01:37 AM

See it just happened again? Kimmy can you ask MiShY yo look into this. I know that I've typed http://www.cybertechhelp.com/ubb/biggrin.gif but :d sows up> http://www.cybertechhelp.com/ubb/confused.gif BTW I did click the Submit Reply button. Sorry.

ironside

October 20th, 2000, 01:46 AM

it just works fine for me http://www.cybertechhelp.com/ubb/biggrin.gif but i always use capital D instead of lower case d

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[This message has been edited by ironside (edited 19 October 2000).]

Sharpy

October 20th, 2000, 02:02 AM

LMAO@Tramtwo, looks like you need some tech support m8. http://www.cybertechhelp.com/ubb/wink.gif

Oops sorry Kimmy but i did change the names to protect the incompetent. http://www.cybertechhelp.com/ubb/wink.gif

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...Sharpy...
Laugh and the world laughs with you... Cry, and the world looks sheepish and suddenly remembers it had other plans.

tramtwo

October 20th, 2000, 02:47 AM

ironside it only happens when you respond with just : D (no space) and nothing else the board changes the D into a d.

Why don't you all try and we'll see.

[This message has been edited by tramtwo (edited 19 October 2000).]

tramtwo

October 20th, 2000, 02:49 AM

ironside

October 20th, 2000, 03:13 AM

:d yep you made your case but it is halloween isnt it,spooky but funny.

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ironside@cybertechhelp.com

[This message has been edited by ironside (edited 19 October 2000).]

FrostyPhrog

October 20th, 2000, 04:43 AM

Hi

just had to try. http://www.cybertechhelp.com/ubb/biggrin.gif http://www.cybertechhelp.com/ubb/biggrin.gif http://www.cybertechhelp.com/ubb/biggrin.gif http://www.cybertechhelp.com/ubb/biggrin.gif http://www.cybertechhelp.com/ubb/biggrin.gif http://www.cybertechhelp.com/ubb/biggrin.gif http://www.cybertechhelp.com/ubb/biggrin.gif

FrostyPhrog

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don't listen to lafave I am not a troublemaker

If a man speaks and there is no woman around to hear him......is he still wrong?

FrostyPhrog

October 20th, 2000, 04:56 AM

Originally posted by FrostyPhrog:
Hi

just had to try. http://www.cybertechhelp.com/ubb/biggrin.gif http://www.cybertechhelp.com/ubb/biggrin.gif http://www.cybertechhelp.com/ubb/biggrin.gif http://www.cybertechhelp.com/ubb/biggrin.gif http://www.cybertechhelp.com/ubb/biggrin.gif

Can you wring a chickens neck and still get eggs from it?

Mental note be nice to wardensu!!!!!!!!!!!!!! http://www.cybertechhelp.com/ubb/biggrin.gif http://www.cybertechhelp.com/ubb/biggrin.gif

FrostyPhrog

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don't listen to lafave I am not a troublemaker

If a man speaks and there is no woman around to hear him......is he still wrong?

well i tried to frosty I think it has to do with how much is here aleady SORRY

[This message has been edited by ironside (edited 19 October 2000).]

ironside

October 20th, 2000, 04:58 AM

frosty he said all by its self with nothing else there and it did the same to me

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FrostyPhrog

October 20th, 2000, 05:18 AM

Hi
Hey Ironside what did I do wrong in the quote that I was trying to post about wardensu. Maybe you can fix it an the I can take a look. I think you guys are seeing things. http://www.cybertechhelp.com/ubb/biggrin.gif http://www.cybertechhelp.com/ubb/biggrin.gif

FrostyPhrog

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don't listen to lafave I am not a troublemaker

If a man speaks and there is no woman around to hear him......is he still wrong?

ironside

October 20th, 2000, 05:31 AM

well i can try frosty

Can you wring a chickens neck and still get eggs from it?

its works in mine but i think what is happening is your getting to much text and the ubb code is having a hard time keeping it stright but i dont know for sure thats mishy area im just guessing.
sorry i did try
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ironside@cybertechhelp.com

[This message has been edited by ironside (edited 19 October 2000).]

Sharpy

October 20th, 2000, 03:14 PM

:d

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...Sharpy...
Laugh and the world laughs with you... Cry, and the world looks sheepish and suddenly remembers it had other plans.

Sharpy

October 20th, 2000, 03:17 PM

Mishy i can't believe this! How are we supposed to post at this board with all these terrible bugs all over the place?

Well i blame the management!

Shockin thats what it is. Shokin!

http://www.cybertechhelp.com/ubb/wink.gif http://www.cybertechhelp.com/ubb/biggrin.gif http://www.cybertechhelp.com/ubb/tongue.gif http://www.cybertechhelp.com/ubb/biggrin.gif http://www.cybertechhelp.com/ubb/wink.gif

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...Sharpy...
Laugh and the world laughs with you... Cry, and the world looks sheepish and suddenly remembers it had other plans.

Kimmygem

October 20th, 2000, 03:31 PM

LMAO! I'd be careful of blaming the management.....ya might just get a kangaroo or a ummmmm......errrrr....a sheep delivered to your front door! http://www.cybertechhelp.com/ubb/biggrin.gif

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Sharpy

October 20th, 2000, 03:37 PM

Hey cool. http://www.cybertechhelp.com/ubb/biggrin.gif I hear the sheep down there are real friendly. http://www.cybertechhelp.com/ubb/wink.gif

I think i'll name her Baaaaarbara.

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...Sharpy...
Laugh and the world laughs with you... Cry, and the world looks sheepish and suddenly remembers it had other plans.

Kimmygem

October 20th, 2000, 04:33 PM

You're dancing with the devil, Sharpy! lol

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Junky

October 20th, 2000, 05:59 PM

:d <------------ this one

what is this new symbol everyone is using?

http://www.cybertechhelp.com/ubb/biggrin.gif

Kimmygem

October 20th, 2000, 06:21 PM

lmao Junky.....It's a "new age" symbol...out with the old, in with the new. http://www.cybertechhelp.com/ubb/biggrin.gif

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