squiffy2
November 5th, 2006, 08:21 PM
Douglas the fisherman is out in his boat one day when he sees a tug on fire,
smoke billowing out of the portholes and the crew trapped inside.
Without a thought for his own safety, he pulled up alongside and with his
trusty axe, hacked down doors and through the bulkheads to reach the men.
After what seemed like hours in the blistering heat, he managed to free the
men and drag them out and onto his fishing boat.
By some strange twist of fate, it turned out that one of the men on board
the tug was Prince Andrew (possibly cadging a lift back from somewhere).
When the Queen heard of the heroic rescue of her favourite son, she pulled
all sorts of strings to get Douglas a knighthood for his deed.
Come the day and Douglas and his family are awaiting his meeting with the
Queen. Unbeknown to him, there is consternation in the Palace as they cannot
find the ceremonial sword used on these occasions. In desperation, they send
one of the butlers out to get a replacement, thinking that no-one would
notice the difference.
Unfortunately, Jeeves can only find a theatrical costume and props shop,
where they have a fake sword made from a kind of bendy stuff.
The ceremony goes ahead and Douglas emerges with his knighthood.
The headlines, the next day, read :
"Rubber dubbed Dug freed men in a tug...."
smoke billowing out of the portholes and the crew trapped inside.
Without a thought for his own safety, he pulled up alongside and with his
trusty axe, hacked down doors and through the bulkheads to reach the men.
After what seemed like hours in the blistering heat, he managed to free the
men and drag them out and onto his fishing boat.
By some strange twist of fate, it turned out that one of the men on board
the tug was Prince Andrew (possibly cadging a lift back from somewhere).
When the Queen heard of the heroic rescue of her favourite son, she pulled
all sorts of strings to get Douglas a knighthood for his deed.
Come the day and Douglas and his family are awaiting his meeting with the
Queen. Unbeknown to him, there is consternation in the Palace as they cannot
find the ceremonial sword used on these occasions. In desperation, they send
one of the butlers out to get a replacement, thinking that no-one would
notice the difference.
Unfortunately, Jeeves can only find a theatrical costume and props shop,
where they have a fake sword made from a kind of bendy stuff.
The ceremony goes ahead and Douglas emerges with his knighthood.
The headlines, the next day, read :
"Rubber dubbed Dug freed men in a tug...."