spunkie1
November 12th, 2006, 07:06 PM
square Balls
Some time last month a little old lady walked into a bank to place a deposit of cash. She approached the counter and asked to see the manager. The assistant said that there was no need for just a small deposit but when the old lady showed her the bag containing the cash she called for the manager.
Out came the manager and invited her into his office. "How much would you like to deposit madam ?" he asked. "£13,480.00 "she replied. "That is a lot of cash to be taking across the street " he said, "how did you come by so much money ?"
"I place bets" she replied. "Oh ? and what kind of bets would they be? asked the bank manager. "I will give you an example" she commented and proceeded to open another bet.
"I bet you £1,000 that your balls are square" Well, naturally the bank manager could see he was onto a winner here so agreed to the bet. "I will be here at 10.00am tomorrow and will bring my solicitor as witness to check the bet."This was agreed, she placed her money in the account and left the bank.
That night the manager had hardly any sleep. He got up every hour, inspecting his testicles and confirmed that they were not square. However, the following morning......
As sure as the sun shines (even behind the clouds) at 10.00 the old lady turns up to her appointment with the bank manager, her solicitor in attendance.
She asks the bank manager if he is still happy with the bet and they both agreed the terms once again with the solicitor as witness.
She asks the manager if he would drop his pants so that she could check to which he complies. "May I feel them ?" she asks, the manage agrees and she feels them to check their shape.
Meanwhile the solicitor is banging his head against the wall with a worried look on his face. The bank manager asks..."What is wrong with him ?" The old lady replied..
"I bet him £5,000 that at 10.00am today I would be feeling the balls of the manager of the local High Street Bank !!!!!!!!!!
-----------------------------------------------
State-of-the-art Watch
A rather confident man walks into a bar and takes a seat next to a very attractive woman. He gives her a quick glance, then casually looks at his watch for a moment.
The woman notices this and asks, "Is your date running late?"
"No", he replies, "I just bought this state-of-the-art watch and I was just testing it."
The intrigued woman says, "A state-of-the-art watch? What's so special about it?"
"It uses alpha waves to telepathically talk to me," he explains.
"What's it telling you now?"
"Well, it says you're not wearing any panties..."
The woman giggles and replies, "Well it must be broken then because I am wearing panties!"
The man explains, "Damn thing must be an hour fast."
--------------------------------------------------------------------------kiddy Kart
A boy was riding along the street in a home-made cart pulled by a dog with a rope attached to the dog's genitals. On the side of the cart the boy had written "POLICE".
A passer-by watched with interest. When the cart stopped, he told the boy: "You know, your police car would go faster if you tied the rope around the dog's neck."
"I know," said the boy, "but I wouldn't get the cool siren."
Some time last month a little old lady walked into a bank to place a deposit of cash. She approached the counter and asked to see the manager. The assistant said that there was no need for just a small deposit but when the old lady showed her the bag containing the cash she called for the manager.
Out came the manager and invited her into his office. "How much would you like to deposit madam ?" he asked. "£13,480.00 "she replied. "That is a lot of cash to be taking across the street " he said, "how did you come by so much money ?"
"I place bets" she replied. "Oh ? and what kind of bets would they be? asked the bank manager. "I will give you an example" she commented and proceeded to open another bet.
"I bet you £1,000 that your balls are square" Well, naturally the bank manager could see he was onto a winner here so agreed to the bet. "I will be here at 10.00am tomorrow and will bring my solicitor as witness to check the bet."This was agreed, she placed her money in the account and left the bank.
That night the manager had hardly any sleep. He got up every hour, inspecting his testicles and confirmed that they were not square. However, the following morning......
As sure as the sun shines (even behind the clouds) at 10.00 the old lady turns up to her appointment with the bank manager, her solicitor in attendance.
She asks the bank manager if he is still happy with the bet and they both agreed the terms once again with the solicitor as witness.
She asks the manager if he would drop his pants so that she could check to which he complies. "May I feel them ?" she asks, the manage agrees and she feels them to check their shape.
Meanwhile the solicitor is banging his head against the wall with a worried look on his face. The bank manager asks..."What is wrong with him ?" The old lady replied..
"I bet him £5,000 that at 10.00am today I would be feeling the balls of the manager of the local High Street Bank !!!!!!!!!!
-----------------------------------------------
State-of-the-art Watch
A rather confident man walks into a bar and takes a seat next to a very attractive woman. He gives her a quick glance, then casually looks at his watch for a moment.
The woman notices this and asks, "Is your date running late?"
"No", he replies, "I just bought this state-of-the-art watch and I was just testing it."
The intrigued woman says, "A state-of-the-art watch? What's so special about it?"
"It uses alpha waves to telepathically talk to me," he explains.
"What's it telling you now?"
"Well, it says you're not wearing any panties..."
The woman giggles and replies, "Well it must be broken then because I am wearing panties!"
The man explains, "Damn thing must be an hour fast."
--------------------------------------------------------------------------kiddy Kart
A boy was riding along the street in a home-made cart pulled by a dog with a rope attached to the dog's genitals. On the side of the cart the boy had written "POLICE".
A passer-by watched with interest. When the cart stopped, he told the boy: "You know, your police car would go faster if you tied the rope around the dog's neck."
"I know," said the boy, "but I wouldn't get the cool siren."