You Would Never Hear A Southerner Say

[mawil]

* I'll take Shakespeare for 1000, Alex.

* Duct tape won't fix that.

* Come to think of it, I'll have a Heineken.

* We don't keep firearms in this house.

* Has anybody seen the sideburns trimmer?

* You can't feed that to the dog.

* I thought Graceland was tacky.

* No kids in the back of the pick-up, it's not safe.

* Wrasslin's fake.

* Honey, did you mail that donation to Greenpeace?

* We're vegetarians.

* Do you think my hair is too big?

* I'll have grapefruit instead of biscuits and gravy.

* Honey, do these bonsai trees need watering?

* Who's Richard Petty?

* Give me the small bag of pork rinds.

* Deer heads detract from the decor.

* Spitting is such a nasty habit.

* I just couldn't find a thing at Wal-Mart today.

* Trim the fat off that steak.

* Cappuccino tastes better than espresso.

* The tires on that truck are too big.

* I'll have the arugula and ridicchio salad.

* I've got it all on a floppy disk.

* Unsweetened tea tastes better.

* Would you like you fish poached or broiled?

* My fiancée, Paula Jo, is registered at Tiffany's.

* I've got two cases of Zima for the Super Bowl.

* Little Debbie snack cakes have too many fat grams.

* Checkmate.

* She's too old to be wearing a bikini.

* Does the salad bar have bean sprouts?

* Hey, here's an episode of "Hee Haw" that we haven't seen.

* I don't have a favorite college team.

* Be sure to bring my salad dressing on the side.

* I believe you cooked those green beans too long.

* Those shorts ought to be a little longer, Darla.

* Elvis who?

[renegade600]

Who is Richard Petty - just teasing...but Elvis Mansion is tacky. I was forced to go there one time. At least there was nothing there about spandex after some of the thing I have said about some who should not be wearing them. And yes I have said she is too old to wear a bikini - shuttering...I used to have a 50 something neighbor who would wear one and it was a fright...

http://www.renegadescove.com/smile/3allthumb.gif

[mawil]

I've seen 50 somethings that look fine in a bikini. Then I've seen some that would look better in a tent. :erm:

[oink]

I like Heineken.

I do trim my sideburns. Besides it was a dumb yankee that they are named after.

I don't like "Wrasslin."

I love grapefruit. We grow lots of them here.

I had to give up pig skins and the steak fat.

What kind of salad?

I still use floppys.

I drink unsweetned tea.

I love broiled fish, sashimi too.

Zima is some nasty s**t.

I gave up the little debbies too.

My kids play chess.

Its the fat not the age that ruins the bikini.

I don't like the green beens over cooked, unless its country style with the fatback.

Other than those corrections the list was good.

[renegade600]

I cannot believe you gave up little debbies :eek: :eek:

[oink]

It was the lil debbies or the beer.