Mr Bean
September 20th, 2005, 01:03 PM
Two Irishmen in London whilst looking for work were strolling down
Oxford Street. After walking for a few minutes, Paddy turns to
Murphy with a
look
of amazement on his face and says:
"Murphy,will you have a look at that shop over there. I thought that
London was supposed to be expensive but that shop is as cheap as
chips!"
Murphy says: "Paddy you're right so you are, will you have a look at
that.
Suits £10.00, Shirts £4.00, Trousers £5.00, I think that we
should
buy the
lot and take them back to Ireland. We would make a tidy profit
selling
them
in Dublin, so we would."
Paddy says in agreement: "Murphy that is as good an idea as you'll
ever have, but I'm pretty sure that you have to pay Taxes and duty on
things
like
that. The shopkeeper will never let us have them if he thinks we're
gonna export them and make our fortune, so he won't."
Murphy thinks and says: "Paddy, I've got idea! You can do the best
English
accent out of the pair of us. You go in there and do the talking and
I'll
just stand behind you and say nothing. He'll never
guess we're Irish. No he won't."
"OK Murphy", agrees Paddy, "I'll do the talking, you just stand there
and look English."
So the two visitors to the illustrious capital city go into the shop,
where
Paddy is greeted politely by the owner. Paddy then proceeds to do
his
best
Cockney impression:
"Awwwight Guvnor, I'll 'ave 20 of yer 'Whistle 'un Flutes', 20
'Dickie Dirts' and 20 pairs of strides. And if yer don't mind I'll be
paying with the 380 'Pictures of the Queen' in my 'Sky Rocket'."
Upon hearing this request from Paddy, the owner smiles, takes a look
at Murphy as well, then says to Paddy "You're Irish aren't you?"
Quite bemused, Paddy replies, "Oh be'Jesus. Mary Mother of Christ, if
that
ain't me best English accent? How in God's name did you know that we
were
Irish?"
The Owner replies "This is a Dry Cleaners".
Oxford Street. After walking for a few minutes, Paddy turns to
Murphy with a
look
of amazement on his face and says:
"Murphy,will you have a look at that shop over there. I thought that
London was supposed to be expensive but that shop is as cheap as
chips!"
Murphy says: "Paddy you're right so you are, will you have a look at
that.
Suits £10.00, Shirts £4.00, Trousers £5.00, I think that we
should
buy the
lot and take them back to Ireland. We would make a tidy profit
selling
them
in Dublin, so we would."
Paddy says in agreement: "Murphy that is as good an idea as you'll
ever have, but I'm pretty sure that you have to pay Taxes and duty on
things
like
that. The shopkeeper will never let us have them if he thinks we're
gonna export them and make our fortune, so he won't."
Murphy thinks and says: "Paddy, I've got idea! You can do the best
English
accent out of the pair of us. You go in there and do the talking and
I'll
just stand behind you and say nothing. He'll never
guess we're Irish. No he won't."
"OK Murphy", agrees Paddy, "I'll do the talking, you just stand there
and look English."
So the two visitors to the illustrious capital city go into the shop,
where
Paddy is greeted politely by the owner. Paddy then proceeds to do
his
best
Cockney impression:
"Awwwight Guvnor, I'll 'ave 20 of yer 'Whistle 'un Flutes', 20
'Dickie Dirts' and 20 pairs of strides. And if yer don't mind I'll be
paying with the 380 'Pictures of the Queen' in my 'Sky Rocket'."
Upon hearing this request from Paddy, the owner smiles, takes a look
at Murphy as well, then says to Paddy "You're Irish aren't you?"
Quite bemused, Paddy replies, "Oh be'Jesus. Mary Mother of Christ, if
that
ain't me best English accent? How in God's name did you know that we
were
Irish?"
The Owner replies "This is a Dry Cleaners".