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Jokes Forum Looking for a laugh and a giggle ? Post your jokes and gags here. Please add *Adult* to the subject title if the joke is of an adult nature. Anything obscene will be removed immediately.

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  #1  
Old December 12th, 2006, 01:38 PM
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squiffy2 squiffy2 is offline
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Smile Useful Military Warnings

Useful Military Warnings
"Aim towards the Enemy." - Instruction printed on US Rocket Launcher
"When the pin is pulled, Mr. Grenade is not our friend." - U.S. Army
"Cluster bombing from B-52s is very, very accurate. The bombs are guaranteed to always hit the ground." - U.S.A.F. Ammo Troop
"If the enemy is in range, so are you." - Infantry Journal
"A slipping gear could let your M203 grenade launcher fire when you least expect it. That would make you quite unpopular in what's left of your unit." - Army's magazine of preventive maintenance.
"It is generally inadvisable to eject directly over the area you just bombed." - U.S. Air Force Manual
"Try to look unimportant; they may be low on ammo." - Infantry Journal
"Tracers work both ways." - U.S. Army Ordnance
"Five-second fuses only last three seconds." - Infantry Journal
"Bravery is being the only one who knows you're afraid." - Col. David Hackworth
"If your attack is going too well, you're probably walking into an ambush." - Infantry Journal
"No combat-ready unit has ever passed inspection." - Joe Gay
"Any ship can be a minesweeper ... once." - Anon
"Never tell the Platoon Sergeant you have nothing to do." - Unknown Army Recruit
"Don't draw fire; it irritates the people around you." - Your Buddies
(And lastly) "If you see a bomb technician running, try to keep up with him." -- U.S.A. Ammo
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  #2  
Old December 12th, 2006, 04:22 PM
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Sir Yuck Sir Yuck is offline
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I fell over on the "When the pin is pulled Mr.Grenade isn't your freind" You got 7 out of 5 rotflol points!!!!!
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  #3  
Old December 13th, 2006, 04:21 AM
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dave01890 dave01890 is offline
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Hooah! Good! I'll have to use these.
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  #4  
Old December 13th, 2006, 08:45 AM
leroys1000 leroys1000 is offline
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The effective range of an excuse is 0 meters.
If it moves shoot it,if it doesn't,paint it.
This is my weapon,this is my gun,
this is for fighting,this is for fun.
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  #5  
Old October 7th, 2022, 07:52 AM
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The Dude The Dude is offline
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Quite useful warnings!!
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